


An Important Question

by Laurasauras



Series: December Dalliances [3]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cute Kids, First Crush, Fluff, M/M, december dalliances
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-07 17:41:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16858456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laurasauras/pseuds/Laurasauras
Summary: John and Dave are kids having a sleepover. Enter cute first crush fluff.





	An Important Question

**Author's Note:**

> Anonymous said:  
> JohnDave fluff please!! <3

John's dad answers the door and Bro has already driven off. John's dad _always_ waits to make sure that John's safe inside your place before he leaves, but Bro doesn't care. You're just glad they're home. It's not like he gave you a chance to call and ask permission. Dadbert takes in your awkward face and the pillow you're holding and smiles, because lucky for you he's not the kind of asshole that needs prior notice for a sleepover.

'Hey Mr E,' you say. 'Can I stay over tonight?'

'Of course, David,' he says. 'Where's your brother?'

'He got last minute tickets to The Dogg. Can't pass that up, sir.'

Dadbert looks baffled, but he lets you in. You rearrange your pillow under your arm and make sure to take your shoes off. Dadbert cares about that kind of thing.

'John!' Dadbert calls. 'David is here!'

The noise that John makes as he runs down the stairs is so distinctive. You already feel yourself relaxing. You don't have to worry about anything in this house, you'll get food at exactly 6pm and they both act the same way all the time. Dorks. You love it.

John bursts into the entry way and grins when he sees you. He does a weird little half run-half walk thing to get to you and throws his arms around you.

'Woah, Egbert, have some chill,' you say, despite absolutely hugging him back.

'You two should play outside,' Dadbert says. 'Now that he's in the same room as you, you have no excuse to be glued to the computer.'

John doesn't bother answering, he just pulls you by the wrist through the house and towards the back door. You drop your stuff on the couch as you pass, and put up enough token resistance to keep your cool points intact. John just drags you harder.

'I didn't know you were coming over tonight!' John says.

'Me neither, dude,' you say. 'But when the pimps in the crib you gotta drop it like it's hot, I don't make the rules, I just get dumped at the house most likely to take me in.'

That's not quite true. If there had been anything resembling food in the house then you probably could have stayed home alone, but you and Bro both knew there wasn't so he didn't argue when you asked him to take you to John's. It was kinda on the way for him anyway.

'You talk a lot of crap,' John says. 'But it's good you're here, because I have a really important question.'

That makes you hella nervous. You don't show it. Nor do you look around to see if Dadbert is in hearing range. You _know_ John's not allowed to swear. You're not supposed to here either, which is always hard to transition in when every f-bomb you drop at home gets you a righteous fistbump.

John lets go of your wrist but you keep following him anyway. He takes you to the tree, where there's shade. Your stupid pale skin is grateful for it already.

'Okay, John, hit me. If you ask me for my hand in marriage, I'm afraid you'll have to get in line. I know the line is long as all get out and that's intimidating, but I process requests pretty quick. Pay no attention to Lalonde bouncing up and down on her little princess shoes, she's got a standing place at the front because she asks so often, bureaucracy man, what are you gonna do? Girl wants in my pants so bad she's willing to put up with my hot self forever and ever just to get the shot at a wedding night.'

John hits you to stop you from talking. He can't do that online. The fact that he can in person feels like cheating.

'I don't want to marry you, Dave, jeez. You're a total nerd-butt.'

'Wow, _cold_. Is my butt specifically nerdy or am I a butt that's nerdy. I need to know for business card purposes.'

'Obviously you're a butt that is nerdy. As if your nerdiness could be contained even in your fat ass.'

You both start laughing at exactly the same time. You're not sure if it's 'cause you're the skinniest kid you know or if it's because the whole conversation is incredibly stupid, but it's definitely worth laughing over. You have to stop when you can feel tears pricking at your eyes and you get rid of any other feelings by pushing John over.

He pushes you back and before you know it, you're having an honest to god wrestle. Bro's taught you how to win at these, you're small and wriggly enough to get out of them without too much trouble, but that's not the point of wrestling with John. It's not fun to beat him into the ground, the whole point is that you're doing stupid shit together that happens to include ... kind of hugging? You're not really sure and you're not going to examine it too hard, you're just not going to let him sit on top of you because he actually does have a fat ass and you don't want to die.

Eventually he calls a truce and you stop trying to push his face into the ground and let him up. Yeah, you don't _need_ to win, but you like that you _can_.

'What's your question, dork-face,' you say, obviously one-upping the nerd-butt insult ironically.

John looks at you with absolute seriousness despite the fact that his glasses have fallen off and he obviously can't see for shit.

'What's your favourite colour?' he asks.

You actually can't think for a moment because you're so stunned that this grade one bullshit has just come out of John's mouth. You're _eight_ what do you care about favourite colours? It's not like you're a girl.

'What the fuck?' you say. John giggles automatically. You glance around, suddenly paranoid that Mr Egbert is _right behind you_. He's not.

'No seriously,' John says. 'Jade's favourite colour is green because her name's a kind of green, Rose's favourite colour is purple because it's the colour of magic and royalty and she's secretly queen of wizards. I don't know what your favourite colour is.'

'I don't know what your favourite colour is either, John,' you say, trying to think.

Is there a cool colour? Is there a choice here that will make you look better than the other options? Shit, if he'd asked you about it then you could have looked it up, found out what Jay Z's favourite is, if that's a thing. Can you say "same as Jay Z?" Nah, that's lame, you can't just piggy-back on someone else.

'I like blue,' John says. Damn that's a good choice. Can you say that too? 'I thought I liked green best, but that's Jade's colour.' Well shit, you have to have different favourites, that narrows it down.

Maybe you should say black. That's cool. Black is on lots of cool shit. But if black was too extra even for Lalonde to choose, then maybe you can't. Maybe John would hit you with the classic "black's not a colour" bullshit. This is a complicated question he's sprung on you.

'So?' John says. 'I need to know, obviously. I can't not know my best friend's favourite colour, Dave, what if we get called on The Newlywed Game. Those prizes are awesome.'

'Yeah, I'm sure you've always wanted a washer dryer combo for your birthday,' you say. You need more _time_ , but you can't tell him your Bro is calling you or whatever like you can online when you need a few minutes to think. You're feeling kinda gooey about the fact that he called you his best friend and that's distracting too. He's your best friend, obviously, but it's special that you're his.

'Red,' you decide. It's a good choice, all the best cars are red, it's a primary colour, you can see Tupac rocking a red suit on the red carpet, everything about that is cool.

'That makes sense,' John says approvingly. You breathe a quiet sigh of relief.

'So, best friend,' you say. 'What are we gonna do. Best friend shit, obviously.'

'Shut up, Dave,' he says, pushing you again. Man, this guy can't keep his hands off you. It makes you grin. 'I know I'm your best friend too, don't even try to say it's Rose because I know she scares you really.'

'Your _mom_ is scared of Rose,' you say.

'Your _face_ is scared of Rose.'

'Your _butt_ is scared of Rose.'

John starts giggling again, which means you've won and you laugh too. When he stops, he looks at you strangely.

'What?' you say.

'Did you know that boys can have boyfriends too?'

'Dude, no they can't. Otherwise no boy would have a girlfriend, girls are fuckin' whack, why would you put up with them if you could have a boyfriend instead.'

'No they _can_ ,' John insists. 'They can even get married now, Dad signed a petition and it's allowed.'

This is very important information. You cannot believe your Bro didn't tell you. Look at you, completely out of the loop like some kind of dweeb. Not good enough. Maybe Bro doesn't know. There's no way he'd deal with all the purses and gay shit that girls do if he knew he could have a boyfriend instead.

'Well shit,' you say.

'I _know_ ,' John says.

'What do we do about this?'

'Duh,' John says. 'We be boyfriends. That way we are completely safe from girls.'

Your stomach flops dramatically in your stomach like maybe you're going to be sick and your hands are really sweaty all of a sudden. You wipe your hands on your jeans. It's not that hot.

'You asking me out, Egbert? What does that even mean?'

'I don't think there are different rules for boyfriends than girlfriends,' John says. 'We can ask Dad, though. I think you just have to be each other's favourite person and sometimes hold hands.'

And _kiss_ , your stupid brain tells you. And you tell your stupid brain, _aaaaaaaahhh_ until it shuts up again.

'Well you're already my favourite person,' you say, staring at the ground. 'You can hold my hand if you want.'

'Cool!' John says, grabbing your hand like it's nothing. You feel like your skeleton is about to vibrate out of your meat body. 'Let's go sneak past my dad so we can play video games.'

You follow him, because he's still holding your hand. You're grinning uncontrollably and you can't bring yourself to stop. Being John's boyfriend is gonna be the best.


End file.
